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  • This Isn’t Love – It’s Emotional Labour
    Self-Abandonment | Build Better Relationships | Emotional Unavailability

    This Isn’t Love – It’s Emotional Labour

    When Emotional Labour in Relationships Gets Rebranded as Love I came across a post the other day that almost made me throw my phone across the room. It was meant to be supportive. Empowering, even….

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  • serious woman thinking about her fawning trauma response
    Self-Abandonment | Create a Life You Love

    Self-Abandonment Is a Trauma Response

    Why fawning is the most rewarded trauma response – and what it’s costing you now. Let’s strip this back to the roots. If you’ve been doing the work of healing – reading the books, following…

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  • how to stop self-abandonment
    Self-Abandonment

    Self-Abandonment Is NOT Your Fault

    Why You Keep Doing It – Even Though You Wish You Could Stop You’re the one who holds it all: You’re the one who makes sure that all the birthdays, Christmases, and other special occasions…

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  • self-abandonment in relationships
    Self-Abandonment

    What Self-Abandonment in Relationships Really Looks Like (And How to Stop It)

    What Self-Abandonment in Relationships Looks Like in Real Time. It started with a casual text from a former client. No red flags. No pressure. “Hey stranger. Want to grab a coffee next week?” But something…

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  • How to find yourself after a breakup.
    Emotional Unavailability | Self-Abandonment

    What No One Tells You About After the Breakup

    Everyone knows about the heartbreak. The crying, the missing, the “how could he” and the “if only…” But no one tells you about what comes after that.Not the grief, but the strange and disorienting empty space…

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  • self-sabotage vs self-abandonment
    Self-Abandonment

    What Is Self-Abandonment? Why It’s Not Self-Sabotage (and What’s Really Going On)

    What You Think Is Sabotage Might Actually Be Something Deeper You’ve probably said it: “Ugh, I always sabotage myself.” But what if what you’re calling self-sabotage is actually something deeper? If you’ve ever wondered what self-abandonment…

    Read More What Is Self-Abandonment? Why It’s Not Self-Sabotage (and What’s Really Going On)Continue

  • self abandonment and the nervouse system
    Self-Abandonment

    Why It’s So Damn Hard to Stop Self-Abandoning (Even When You Know Better)

    Stop self-abandonment… if only it were that easy. You already know you do it. You say “yes” when you mean “no.” You avoid hard conversations. You keep the peace. You downplay your needs. You smile through the…

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  • woman wondering about her scarcity mindset in love...
    Self-Abandonment | Emotional Unavailability

    How Your Scarcity Mindset Quietly Sabotages Your Relationships (And What To Do About It)

    You know about scarcity mindset when it comes to money. But what about a scarcity mindset in love? If you find yourself stuck in situationships and almost-relationships, tolerating crumbs, or constantly trying to earn someone’s…

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  • reclaiming your authentic self
    Self-Abandonment

    Self-Abandonment and the Hidden Link to Anxiety

    Self-abandonment and anxiety are deeply connected – the roots of it may surprise you. Anxiety can feel like an unrelenting force, something you live with on the regular, and you can often feel powerless to…

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  • Woman pausing on phone — symbolic of emotional overwhelm and self-abandonment in relationships
    Self-Abandonment | Emotional Unavailability

    Self-Abandonment in Relationships: What It Is, and How to Stop

    Are You Abandoning Yourself? Here’s How to Finally Choose You You know the moment. You feel the truth in your gut – but override it anyway. You justify. You wait. You shrink yourself just a…

    Read More Self-Abandonment in Relationships: What It Is, and How to StopContinue

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Heather Spurrell life coach
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